I thought I was done writing about Breaking Amish. Turns out, it just doesn’t feel right to stop now. Episode 3 was pretty boring for me. There are significantly fewer lies in this episode but the false implications (e.g. just leaving the Amish, experiencing these things for the first time, etc.) remain. I wonder if somebody in some production studio had to work overtime rewriting the episode because of the huge backlash against the show.

The first thing I noticed was the absence of the written introduction. When the first two episodes played on TV, one of the first frames showed the line, “They’ll leave their community for the first time”. That introduction is gone in episode 3 and I thank TLC for that.

In this episode, Jeremiah drives a car under the watchful eye of an instructor. He makes a grand show of being an inexperienced driver and even knocks over a traffic cone to complete the illusion. Jeremiah says that he has driven before but only on country roads. Lie! I know for a fact that Jeremiah has driven quite a bit in a city with a population of more than 50,000 people. While it might not have been NYC, it was definitely more than a country road. I know this fact because I saw it with my own eyes and I could find a dozen witnesses who would agree with me. He drove just fine then and that was about four or five years ago. I suspect that he got to that city by driving more than a thousand miles on the interstate highway system.

That was the only outright lie that I caught on last night’s episode (definitely a significant drop in the number of lies) but there are plenty of false implications there that are just not explicitly voiced. The implication is still there that these kids are leaving the Amish for the first time (well, except for Jeremiah who admits to being kicked out of the Amish three times already), and experiencing these “English” things for the first time.

As for TLC’s promise to bring light to the controversy… well, I didn’t see any in this episode. There are no explanations for the lies that we’ve uncovered. All that TLC gives us in this episode is several allusions to an explanation. These are when Jeremiah admits that he’s been kicked out of the Amish three times already and when he reveals that he’s worn “English” clothes before.

In this episode, Kate and Rebecca visit a modeling agency and they are asked pose in swimsuits. Rebecca tells us, “I believe in modesty, and spreading yourself out for the world to see you naked, that is not modesty to me, at all.” It sounds like she’s talking about a Penthouse spread but from the context I think she’s talking about wearing a swimsuit. Check out this photo taken about two years before filming began and judge for yourself whether Rebecca is really too modest to wear a swimsuit. Click to enlarge.

The above photo is courtesy of Shannon Marie Edwards via https://www.facebook.com/BreakingAmishTheExpose

I found the original on Facebook and it was uploaded on June 12, 2010 so the date on the photo is accurate.

In this episode, Rebecca’s grandfather visits her in New York City. This man is quite a bit heavier than the grandfather that Rebecca chased into the house back in episode one. Sources tell us that this second grandfather really is her grandfather but the first one was not. Funny thing is, both grandfathers say the exact same sentence with voices that sound exactly the same to me. I think the same soundbite might have been used for both people.

The only other gripe I have with this episode is the rude and cruel language used by some of the cast. Rebecca likens the French lady from the modeling agency to a heel-biting Chihuahua. Jeremiah says he would have told his mom to get the f*** out. These are the words of a-holes no matter what the cultural background.

The one part of this episode that I liked was the reference to Amish home cooking when Abe and his mom are chatting in the restaurant. Amish home cooking really is the best. You won’t find a better pie, or better mashed potatoes, or even better cereal, than what my Amish mom makes.